Archive for April, 2011

I went to the library today

April 26, 2011

to find out about volunteer opportunities over the summer.  They’re going to have two really fun programs going on for elementary-aged kids — the younger ones are going to be doing a sort of Ranger Rick-style exploration of bugs and worms and creepy crawlies, and the older ones are going to be doing paint and paper crafts.  I’m having a hard time deciding which one to volunteer for…

Irony

April 24, 2011

On the table at the luncheon at my grandma’s place today — Easter ham and Passover matzah.  (I ate the matzah.)

I totally made his day

April 22, 2011

No, I didn’t do anything naughty. 😉  I just took home the hospital socks they gave me at my MRI.  Osker did eat the last pair, after all.  The MRI tech couldn’t have been happier.

How many telephone calls

April 21, 2011

does it take to schedule an MRI?

Call 1:

Them: “Hi, we’d like to schedule you for an MRI on Friday at 2:45 in Physicians’ Plaza.”
Me: “kthxbye.”

Call 2:

Them: “Hi, we’d like to reschedule you for 3:15.”
Me: “kthxbye.”

Call 3:

Them: “Hi, we’d like to change the location to Methodist Hospital.”
Me: “kthxbye.”

Call 4:

Them: “Hi, we need to verify your insurance information before your appointment.”
Me: “kthxbye.”

How many more phone calls do y’all think I’ll get?

Because Les Miserables is my favorite musical

April 20, 2011

Chag sameach

April 18, 2011

My dog cracks me up

April 17, 2011

If I’m in bed, Osker’s in bed with me.

This morning we were watching Dr. Oz.  A woman had sent in a video asking for help with her husband’s snoring problem.  She had taped him while he was sleeping to demonstrate the extent of the problem.

The sound of the man’s snoring got Osker’s attention.  He likes to talk.  Here’s what the conversation sounded like:

Snoring man:  Unnnnngh.
Osker: Rrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Snoring man:  Unnnnngh.
Osker: Rrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Snoring man:  Unnnnngh.
Osker: Rrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Oh, the things that entertain me.

These dogs are worthless

April 14, 2011

They bark at every vehicle that comes by the house… except the cop car that’s out there right now.  Thank goodness the policemen were facing away when I saw them through the window — I’m in some pretty thin pajamas!

3-for-1

April 13, 2011

I woke up at 4am today.  Absolutely could not go back to sleep.  Since I had to get ready to go to the doctor anyway, I just decided to go ahead and take a shower.

After my shower, I crawled back in bed, rather bleary-eyed and with water in my ears.  I had my back to the TV, which was advertising a buy one, get two free deal on soup.

Three men’s soups, 179.99!  Three women’s soups, 139.99!

Then I thought to myself, That’s odd.  Since when is there a difference between soup for men and women?  And since when is 139.99 a reasonable price for soup?

And then I realized: SUITS.

How to prepare for a mammogram

April 12, 2011

Have your mom sit on your right boob.

Sigh.  Thankfully, it’s the smaller one.