Archive for the ‘grammar’ Category

I love it when my mom makes me laugh

February 10, 2012

I learned something new today — “nonwithstanding” is not a word.  The correct word is “notwithstanding”.  (Yes, it is possible to teach a proofreader new tricks.)  My mom couldn’t believe I didn’t know that, and she was so proud of herself for knowing something that I didn’t know.

Of course, today as she was labeling her file folders alphabetically, she wrote A-B-C-D-E-F-G-A.  She may be retired now, but she’ll still always be a music teacher!

PSA

June 12, 2011

“Potato” doesn’t have an E at the end. Neither does “tomato”. Just think of it this way — they are not endowed with a big toe to hop around on.

Fast food for horses?

March 9, 2011

Seen on a fast food chain’s billboard: Try our $1.99 Oat Meal.

Vocabulary

March 6, 2011

Since when is “gooder” a word?  I’ve seen it in two separate commercials now… it’s making me roll my eyes.

Another one for the dumb files

January 6, 2011

It’s amazing what gets shown on TV these days.  Take this commercial:

“If you took (Drug X) and suffered death, heart attack or stroke, call 1-800-123-4567.  You could receive compensation!”

I can see it now.  The telephone rings.  “Hi.  This is a long-distance call from Heaven, so you’d better not put me on hold.  G-d’s on our side for this, so go after these people for all they’re worth!”

Oh, wait… the Bible says “you can’t take it with you” (more or less)… never mind about that compensation thing.

Why the local bank needs to hire me

October 18, 2010

Because Babelfish French just doesn’t cut it.  Don’t believe me?  You try to read this:

Pour d courvrir si la loi d’accessibilite aux soins (ACA) vous autorise recevoir de futures notifications sur les d terminations d’avantages indesirables en Francais, appeler le num ro au dos de votre carte de membre.

(The Spanish is just as bad, in case you were wondering.  Don’t know about the German and the Portuguese.)

On the appropriate use of punctuation

September 9, 2010

The best headline I’ve ever seen in the New York Times:

Naomi Campbell: Model, Citizen

What a difference a comma makes!

Legalese

August 2, 2010

You’ve just gotta love legal language.  I was reading the warranty for the new external CD/DVD drive for my computer last night, and one type of problem not covered by warranty is  “acts of God”.

So… what exactly do we classify as an “act of God”?  And if the product owner in question is an atheist, does this clause still apply?

Food for thought. 😉

I like the alot. A lot.

May 4, 2010

Here he is:

And here are a lot of his alot buddies.

C’mon.  You know you love him, too. 😉

You know me too well

October 22, 2009

your crystalball

Guilty as charged… 😉